I love the movie 'What About Bob.' Who doesn't really? "Good chicken, good corn, is this hand shucked?" There is lots to be learned from Bob Wiley and Death Therapy but alas. I digress.
Again giving more thought to the mantra that life is a story unfolding. Shakespeare had it right, life is play and we are merely players, or something to that effect. Again, not sure who's really reading this or where you're at with the question of does God exist or if you even care, but my experience tells me that He does and that He's had a guiding hand on my life since the moment I was conceived. There's is no other explanation for what has happened and what is happening. It's a lot. Baby steps remember? Here's why.
I was born to a woman who, due to life circumstance could not provide for me. Just like any situation where the state is involved (oh, holla if you hear me) the process is long and emotional and uncertain. Now mind you, I am in infant while all this is happening. Not really speaking up for myself and at the mercy of the wise adults to do what's best. Well, God had a plan, a story in the making if you will, and by His grace I was adopted, raised the best way my parents knew how, (and they did do a good job if I do say so myself) and now here I sit to process all of this. It's a little overwhelming, and if Dr. Leo Marvin were here I know he'd tell me to take a vacation from my problems.
I was raised in the church. And by that I mean I was raised BY the church. I am so fortunate to have had the upbringing I've had, although not without heartache or struggle, no life is perfect, but for some reason there was always this feeling of where do I really fit in. My family photos are quite comical. I have brown hair and brown eyes and my family is blond and blue eyed. 'One if these things is not like the other...' I used to make up nationalities as a kid since I didn't have any information of my blood background. So it started with things like, maybe I'm part Puerto Rican or Moroccan (personal favorite, sounds cool!) I play drums, self taught, so I have to explain the rhythm somehow! My mom, the angel who raised me, used to tell me that I got my rhythm from her because she would hold me during church services and count the beat on my back to the hymns. That's sweet. But I don't think so. Sorry Ma! I now know that I am Irish and Sicilian so I am constantly angry with myself, which makes total sense! I still hold out hope since the birth dad thing is still up for debate so I'm pretty sure he's got some cool exotic linage and maybe one day I'll be summoned to take my birthright as the Princess of some cool exotic land. Okay, maybe not, but that would be pretty sweet right?
All this is to say that it does something to a person to find out information years later and answers to questions that have caused such turmoil and feelings of uncertainty. This is what I mean about the story. Clearly there were things set in motion years before that all lead up to the moment when a person from my past called me with shocking news...
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